Monday, June 16, 2008


I don't know why it is, but announcing that today would be my 100th posting here at AFTER MIDNIGHT put an unusually high amount of pressure on me. So, as I frequently do when I have no ideas [more often than I'd like to admit to], I went trolling on the Blogosphere, looking for a clever image to illustrate the page [I believe the right picture is worth a thousand words]. The illustration turned up at Skinny Moose Media, along with an article [] on the top 10 reasons blogs fail. Well, thought I, I've gotten to my 100th post, so I must be doing something right. Not a chance. Here are the articles 10 reasons, along with my take on how well I'm avoiding the problem
-1. / Lack of long term ambition and commitment - I think that's a rather personal way to start, don't you? Bad enough I've had to deal with family and friends' comments on my lack of ambition; I don't need to hear that from some fellow blogger! As for lack of commitment, it's only because no one is willing to sign the papers! So take it up with The Rest Of The World. I'm willing to do my part.
-2. / Failure to grasp realities of blogging - If I wanted a firm grasp on reality, would I be blogging? Wouldn't I get a REAL hobby? Like chess? Or bonsai tree gardening [ I remember someone once pointing out that, given the amount of time humans spend trying to have sex versus the amount of time we actually HAVE sex, it's hardly worth the effort. I believe the writer recommended cultivating bonsai trees as a healthy alternative]?
-3. / Not standing out...being part of the mold - Yes, there is a little mold on the edges of this blog. I live in Niagara Falls. It's damp in there, with all that water rushing over me. Mold can't be helped. As for standing out, what better way is there to becoming a target? Crouch behind a rock or tree; otherwise, you're an easy mark for sniper fire.
-4. / Unattractive Content - I just think that's a little PERSONAL, don't you? I try to keep my blog up, change the widgets periodically, that sort of thing. But, as a blog gets older, it just has a tendency to get, well, "unattractive". If you think my content is unattractive, don't look at me!
-5. / No Time - Late-60's hit by the Guess Who, if memory serves me right.
-6. / Lack of promotional skills and outreach - I designed and rented a great billboard to promote this site. How was I to know the only bridge that led to it would be condemned?
-7. / Not posting frequently enough - C'mon people! It only took me 20 months to reach the 100-post milestone [Yes, I know there are people who post daily. They need a life, don't you think?
-8. / Too broad of a topic - I believe women deserve to be treated with dignity and, more importantly, respect. Calling a woman a "broad", or implying that's all I write about, is an insult to me, The Woman I Love [wondering when I'd get in a reference to her, weren't you?], and every broad who wastes a few minutes with this fine site!
-9. / Ugly template - While I have to admit the Skinny Moose template is clean and reasonably attractive, isn't it time we stopped making judgements based on appearance? Can't we put the emphasis on ideas? And, finally,
-10. / Spamming, and being an Annoying Blogger - Do you have any idea how many bloggers would have to give it up if they couldn't be annoying? As for Spamming, I've always enjoyed a Spam sandwich, and am not going to stop just because some Skinny Moose doesn't like it! So there!
I seem to have gone on a bit longer than I'd originally planned. So, with that, I'll take my leave of the podium until Friday, when we'll reconvene for the first ever Celebrity Blog Roast [These "guests" are as much celebrities as I am; that is, not at all. But I've always enjoyed their work, and I suspect their innate bitterness will keep the frivolity flowing!]. Scheduled to appear, in no particular order, are:
The Aging Disco Diva
That Grrl
Relax Max, purveyor of BritishSpeak and The Slap And Tickle
Margie and Edna, residents of Margie and Edna's Basement
A special tip of the "courtesy" hat to Bengo & Pug, creators of the new web comic Li'l Nyet for the sweet anniversary "card", elsewhere on this page. And to all of you, thanx for your continued support. I COULD do this without you, but why bother?


Laura said...

I'll have you know I am an Internet personality. Yes, I laughed the first time someone told me they were an Internet personality too. But, in my case it's true. :P

Deb said...

Congratulations. I knew you had it in you, and that it would fester and fever until you got it out. Here's to the next 100.

foongpc said...

Mike, congrats on your 100th post! I will let you know when mine reach 100 - still a long way to go! : )

Mike Riley said...

Laura, Deb and Foongpc-

Thanks for the kind words. Laura, you're right; you Are an Internet personality. Or maybe an icon. Or a link; I'm not sure. Deb, I credit the penicillin for getting this out[Of course, it also made me glow sickly yellow. But that's just to be accepted].
Foongpc, you'll get to 100 posts. I believe in you [then again, I believe I may be totally insane. As do many of my readers]!

- MR